A COVID-themed photoshoot with Fashion Photographer Ashley Gallerani
The last week of February, before lockdown officially started in New York, my husband started asking me to stay home, skip events and avoid going to crowded cafes or The Wing, where I usually like to go do work at. I remember being a little annoyed about how paranoid he was but when my mom in Taiwan suggested the same thing, I decided to be “good” and work from home for a while until “this virus scare” went away. We were supposed to be in France and Italy the following week, but that was, of course, cancelled literally days before we were about to fly out.
Thankfully, my husband and I, as well as close friends and family, have all been safe and doing well. At the end of the day, being healthy really is the most important thing.
When things gradually got better and better in New York and restaurants started offering outdoor dining, my good friend and talented fashion photographer Ashley Gallerani launched her own photo studio — Studio AG — in Brooklyn. The space allowed Ashley to create content and continue working in a safe way without interruptions.
I got really excited when her studio became available for photoshoots because during the lockdown, I spent a lot of time pinning creative portraits and other fun photoshoot ideas on Pinterest — there was a “creative” itch in my stomach and I couldn’t wait to make some magic happen with Ashley when it was safe enough for me to venture out.
To really document how I’ve felt during all this time, I decided to do 3 sets of photoshoots with a collective COVID-theme, reflecting my perspective as someone who stayed in New York City throughout this challenging time. Perhaps you’ll find yourself being able to relate to one, two or all of them? Read on for more.
Honestly, did we gain or lose time?
During the “peak” of COVID, when non-essential workers were all in lockdown and staying indoors, a lot of people talked about gaining extra time for things that they never had a chance to do. I, too, started painting again, reading the books that have been on my list forever, and FaceTiming with family and friends. I also binge-watched a ton of TV shows with my husband and we played a whole of of boardgames together. All this “extra” time was great.
And then we blinked, and it went from April to September. I thought we gained time, didn’t we? But where did spring and summer go? All of sudden, I felt like we’ve lost so much time. Does this year even count?
Can we see clearly into the future when “time” gets in the way? Have you ever thought about your relationship with “time” before?
The experience made me realize how I’ve been perceiving time, and how I’ve associated it with the way I put it to use. The more I do, the “more time” I felt like I had. As if what we do is what really illustrates the existence of time. And I guess because I don’t truly value the beauty of painting or playing games, perhaps that is why in my head — those hours that added up to days were insignificant.
However, when I think back, I realized: I did gain time to spend on myself and with my loved ones. How rude of me to dismiss those valuable moments of laughter when FaceTiming with friends and knowledge from reading or watching documentaries!
So after all, despite feeling like many of us have not “lived” in 2020, I have in fact gained more than I thought thus far.
“I can’t breathe.”
I’ve always been a person who is open about expressing my feelings. When I watch a sad movie, I cry. When I hear a joke, I laugh. I also know I’m an emphatic person. When my husband is having a bad day, it’s as if my day is bad, too. When my mom feels hurt, I’m hurting, too.
I never thought I would feel “connected” to strangers in the same way, until reading all the articles about COVID patients.
In April and May, I read the news every day to stay up to date with the situation in New York. And almost every day, I would come across a story about somebody suffering from COVID — what their bodies were experiencing, how lonely they feel being away from their families, etc. — the worst was reading about people dying alone and saying their goodbyes via iPads.
One day, I came across this story about a 7-months pregnant woman in Brooklyn who had COVID. Her case was a serious one and she needed a ventilator to breathe. When I read about her “gasping for air,” I felt like I needed to take a few deep breaths to breathe. Because she could barely breathe on her own, it was causing her baby to have low oxygen levels, too — and the doctors had to decide whether or not to give her a c-section to get the baby out earlier than the due date. And at this point, I remember it was as if I had been placed in a confined space with very little air.
This also reminded me of my grandfather who passed away 3 years ago. He had a tumor in his throat and in order for him to breathe, he had to open up a passageway with a tube. Because of this, he wasn’t able to speak. So he would write to us on his notepad when he wanted to communicate with us. The first thing he wrote after the operation was: “It’s so good, being able to breathe.”
I believe that was the first time I learned how scary it really is not being able to breathe.
I cannot imagine how COVID patients who had difficulty breathing felt, but I do know it is very scary not being able to breathe.
We take every breathe for granted, and this reminded me to be grateful for good healthy, especially this year.
Wearing a mask is the 2020 way of giving someone flowers and showing that you care.
I understand some people may disagree with me on this, but I honestly believe in wearing a mask when it comes to keeping yourself and others safe. In a blog post where I shared my reviews on 5 face masks, I briefly talked about my personal experience during SARS and how fast Taiwan responded to COVID when people started protecting themselves and others by wearing a mask without the government mandating it.
In this post of me wearing a face mask that was published on my Instagram early August, a person left a comment and said I would be “more beautiful if I didn’t wear a mask.” And instead of ignoring a comment that appears slightly negative, like I would have done so in the past, I replied and said: “I’m actually more beautiful with the mask on because I’m keeping myself and others safe.”
The way I see it, wearing a mask is equivalent to sending someone flowers this year, because you’re doing it to keep others from getting sick in case you are. Since someone with COVID don’t show symptoms until a few days later, you never know when you may be spreading the virus. Even if it’s not a 100% protective measure, there is proof that mask-wearing has helped decrease the number of cases in various cities. We used to think doctors and nurses wear masks to protect themselves from sick patients, but now I understand it’s mostly them trying to prevent giving anything to people who are weaker in the hospital.
I know wearing a mask may be annoying and troublesome; I’ve personally been getting lots of mask acne. But I think about being able to do something as simple as covering your mouth to keep more people from getting sick, and that alone is enough motivation for me to look pass my personal discomfort and skin problems.
I hope you enjoyed reading this post — and that you’ll join me in continuously spreading love instead of the virus :)
Let me know what your experience have been this year in the comments below, I’d love to read about your stories!
Love,
Tricia